


Lost

by Canadian_nights



Category: Cardinal (TV 2017)
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Eventual Smut, F/M, Feelings Realization, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:13:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27035485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Canadian_nights/pseuds/Canadian_nights
Summary: So I was listening to the Biffy Clyro song - 'Space' and for some reason it sounded in my head very like the Lise/John relationship and inspired me towards this slightly rough story. Obviously I own neither the lovely lyrics nor the characters but they seem to go well together.“We carried our past and cradled the stormWe tried to conceal the scars we wore'Cause we couldn't show what we couldn't showI get lost sometimesWith you I am foundI get lost so I'll follow the light to your heartWill you wait, will you wait for me?There's always a space in my heartI'm still caught in your gravityNo matter the distance between usOur joy lives in the moments we shareLove sure is meaningless when you're not thereAnd then the silence fellWe bit our tongues, with which we tellAll of our dreams”This is set somewhere in season 2 in a slightly parallel world where Catherine is still alive but in hospital.
Relationships: John Cardinal & Lise Delorme, John Cardinal/Lise Delorme
Comments: 3
Kudos: 9





	Lost

**Author's Note:**

> There are probably a lot of grammatical errors from my sleepy brain but I hope you enjoy. Whilst I can't see John betraying Catherine I can see a scenario like this happening. It is a bit angsty and full of hurt and comfort .. will leave it to you guys to decide how it ends.

It had been such an awful day at work and Lise couldn’t settle. She knew John would be sat alone as well, probably struggling equally badly to stop his mind playing over the terrible images from the crime scene that they both had to endure today. It wasn’t something they did -seeking each other out in the dark of the night, but it felt the right decision as she pulled on her jacket and boots and headed down to her car. She had stopped off to pick up some take-out noodles and a large bottle of the Canadian Whisky she knew he enjoyed. 

When she pulled up at his place it was dark and the curtains drawn. Already committed this far she decided to knock once and then leave. The sound waking him from a broken slumber on his uncomfortable sofa. Heaving himself up he grumpily headed to the door, his face brightening immediately at the sight of his partner on his step. 

“I couldn’t sleep..” she followed up her words by thrusting her gifts into his arms. “Can I come in?”

Hurrying backwards he ushered her out of the cold, walking her through to the kitchen to grab some cutlery and glasses. 

“Sorry the place is a bit of a mess.” 

He looked embarrassed as he cleared a space on the couch, lifting a grey shirt from the cushion and sliding papers from the oak table to set down the food and drink. 

“Thanks.. This is err.. just what I needed.”

\-------------------

Half a bottle later and he had forgotten the backpack of inhibitions that he was so used to carrying around. Sitting together in the dim light of his lounge, with his lips loosened by whisky, he pinned her with an only slightly joking Cardinal stare. “I always wanted to know Lise…How old did you tell Josh you thought I was when we first started working together?”

Lise was feeling suddenly very warm and flustered by this new side to John Cardinal. The man she once thought she disliked but who she now couldn’t imagine her life without. The man whom was now sitting very close, so close in fact that his warm thigh had brushed against her more than once. She cringed inwardly, remembering back to that awkward meeting in the office. She had wanted to murder Josh for turning up unannounced and embarrassing her in front of her partner, who clearly hadn’t forgotten. Looking up at him she tried to deflect the question with a smile. 

“We both know how things worked out with Josh, I wouldn’t think too much on anything he said. He wasn’t .. well you could say he was never your biggest fan.” 

Looking back at her whisky, Lise took another throat burning sip before she fixed his gaze again.  
“You can’t deny that you didn’t make it easy, when we first met, you took more than a bit of warming up John, before I got to see a glimpse of the real you.”

Looking at him as he absorbed her words, she watched as he blinked slowly expelling a sigh through his nose as a pained smile flickered across his previously relaxed features. 

“I don’t let many people in anymore Lise… I.. things have been hard.”

There was a long pause as he poured himself another very large serving of the numbing amber liquid. “I hope the real me isn’t too much of a disappointment to you. I’m not the bright eyed resilient cop I once was..”, his eyes had glazed, starring at an indeterminant point in the distant darkness, “…a lifetime ago.” 

Lise hated how difficult he was finding the world and her heart ached, suddenly desperate to take some of his pain away, as she watched his weary frame collapse back into the cushions of the sofa. His eyes stayed closed and she wasn’t sure anymore if he was still talking to her, or just to himself. 

“I can’t remember the last time I was able to speak to my wife without walking on eggshells or when I was last able to enjoy spending time with her without worrying if today was the day she would stop her meds and spiral back into the horror of her illness. I’m terrified all the time Lise and I hate myself that I nearly don’t want her to be released from hospital this time… because I can’t face it all again.” 

His lumbering frame lurched forward, the alcohol now clearly affecting his coordination as he clumsily released his empty glass onto the heavy wooden table. Running his long fingers through his hair, he leant back again and Lise was able to see his face more clearly, clouded with pain and with tears in his eyes that he could no longer blink away. His words had become an almost inaudible gravelly mumble, as his piercing eyes finally looked back at her. 

“I get lost sometimes.”

Unable to stop the almost reflexive movement, she let her hands cup his cheeks so that the pads of her thumbs could carefully wipe the moisture from his eyes. His expression softened at the feel of her skin against his own and Lise couldn’t bring herself to move, instead letting her fingers run gentle comforting strokes along his jaw. 

A calmness had settled over him at the outpouring of some of his pent-up pain and the lovely tingling sensation left on his skin under her delicate fingers. He couldn’t remember ever wanting to open up to anyone as much as he did with Lise. She instinctively understood him, without him even needing to speak. Lise had found him in the darkness, gradually edging nearer until he found himself irrevocably drawn to her warmth and light. 

Everything that happened next was a blur of alcohol and something a lot more meaningful. She felt him shift against her, turning his face into her hand so that his warm soft lips could plant lingering kisses across her palm, whilst the soft hair of his beard tickled her skin. A very small voice in her head tried to remind her that this was a very dangerous line to cross which they might both regret in the cold light of day. Any doubts, however, were quickly drowned out by the sound of her now racing heart, whooshing in her ears as his teeth nuzzled against her wrist. She put up no resistance as he drew her across to his lap, pulling her down into a crushing kiss. He tasted of whisky and lust as he eagerly parted her lips, rushing to deepen their connection. 

Her body caught fire as his hot rough hands slid down her back, slipping inside her shirt to rest against the bare skin of her hips, pressing her down into his lap and the growing bulge in his pants as he arched up against her. Releasing her lips temporarily from his rigorous attentions, he pulled her shirt up over her head, giving his emboldened eyes full access to her stunning curves. There was an inexplicable, reassuring familiarity between them as they keenly explored one another’s bodies for the first time. Lise’s fingers pulling open his shirt to run her palms along the hard contours of his chest whilst his lips trailed down her neck, marking her possessively with bruising kisses.  
Both parties quickly losing patience at the inability to remove any more clothes in this position, his strong arms raised Lise from his lap guiding her down onto the cushions and sliding down her pants and underwear. Kneeling on the floor his hot mouth found her delicate folds, tasting her arousal as he traced his tongue up to suck down on her now throbbing core. The feel of his skilful hot lips was overwhelming and she quickly came undone against his mouth. 

The look of desire in his black eyes nearly caused her to lose control all over again as she pulled his body up to rest on top of her on the couch, curling her legs around his hips so that he could slide easily into her ready body. He was urgent and quick, spilling into her already satiated body faster than he wanted. 

Suddenly conscious of being naked and cold they shared a look mixed with guilt and longing. 

“Please stay tonight Lise.” The whispered words tumbled out of his mouth before he had time to process what he was saying.


End file.
